The Road Home

Ever been driving and turned your head to check out something that caught your eye on the other side of the road? What happens? You drift off into the other lane and potentially crash.

When purchasing a home, it’s SO easy to turn your head and start to drift into someone else’s lane. And by drifting into someone else’s lane I mean totally lose sight of what’s important to you. When you’re fighting for a home you think you love, the dynamic quickly transforms from casual home shopping to fierce competition without you even realizing it. When you find a house that “could be the one”, instantly you’re no longer admiring a life that could be from afar – you’re in the arena now. You’re fighting for what could be yours. It’s no longer about looking. It’s now about winning. Winning the house. Winning the lifestyle that comes with it. The neighborhood, the pool, the privacy.

You want this life. You want the keys. You want this process to be over. You have to win. And sometimes the cost of winning calls you to compromise your own wants and needs. Suddenly, you’re in someone else’s lane and willing to pay the steep price of sacrifice in order to win this life – after all, you can see it, you can taste it, you can feel it. And you’ll do anything not to lose it.

You convince yourself you don’t need that extra bathroom. Or that you don’t mind climbing the stairs to get to your bedroom when you really wanted a ranch. Or that you can overlook the structural issues that the seller isn’t willing to fix but you know you can’t afford. Or that you have the time to take on a total fixer upper that your lifestyle doesn’t support. Or that you can just cook dinner at home every night and never dine out again so you can afford the mortgage payment. The rationalizations go on and on.

You’re captivated by the potential of what could be. And you’re ready to make it your reality.

You’re about to write the offer. The offer that will win you your new life. Your agent anxiously awaits your call. But for some reason the phone becomes too heavy. You were intoxicated by the allure of the new but something causes you to pause. Back and forth. Weighing options. Crunching numbers. Asking questions trying to convince yourself that this life is still within reach. Can you deal with the layout that you don’t love? You have enough money to close but can you sustain the monthly mortgage payments? Will your children still be able to participate in the extra curricular activities they love? Can you still afford to take your annual family vacation?

The thought of what you will actually be giving up with the life that you have versus the appeal of the hypothetical life that could be starts to take over.

Suddenly, you’re back. Driving in your own lane instead of drifting off into someone’s else’s because the sights are beautiful. From your own lane, you can see the road ahead. The road you know your family will be safe on.

When you feel that pull, tugging you towards the wrong side of the road, it’s time to put your blinders on. To drown out the noise and pause. To maintain your lane, knowing that no matter the outcome, you can’t lose. You can’t lose because you’re choosing yourself. You’re choosing your family. You’re choosing the life that is within the boundaries you set. And when you make that choice, you always win.

Choose the house that’s off an exit on your side of the highway. Not an exit you have to cross a median and crash to get to.

When you’re driving in your own lane, the road always leads home.